Friday, March 07, 2014
There never used to be “wardrobe malfunctions” at sporting events. You know why? Because athletes used to wear clothes from head to toe. Consider the famous running scene in Rocky. The Italian Stallion goes sprinting through the old neighborhood and up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art in a thick gray sweatsuit. Long sleeves, full-length pants.
When was the last time you saw somebody jogging in a sweatsuit?
Today, sports uniforms are tight fitting and made of lightweight material. The primary benefit of this evolution, of course, is performance. But the secondary benefit? Unexpected boob sightings. In fact, these days you can hardly watch a (female) sporting event without seeing a nipple, butt crack, or tightly packaged derriere.
Perhaps Arantxa Rus thought her skirt provided more coverage than it actually did.
Usually, gymnasts want to keep their underwear inside their leotards, don’t they?
To be honest, it looks like this is exactly how these cheerleader uniforms are supposed to look. But let’s just pretend it’s an accident, because that’s more fun.
Hey, look. More gymnastics underwear. Neat.
I bet Lingerie Football League teams spend a lot of time practicing the quick boob-cover-up.
When you wear a teddy and jump in the wring to wrestle somebody, this is almost inevitable.
In retrospect, they probably should have taped this thing down. But I think we’re all glad they didn’t.
Gymnasts practice like 60 hours a week and tend to be pretty hard on themselves. But I didn’t know they were this hard on themselves.
If you pull their underwear down around their ankles, they can’t run. It’s a pretty solid strategy.
You rarely see this sort of thing from the pros, but I imagine it’s pretty common among amateurs.
Yet another wardrobe malfunction from the world of pro wrestling. In fairness, it’s hard to reign in those giant fake boobs.
Not only was this embarrassing, it also created a lot of drag which caused her to lose the race. Bummer. (Get it?)
I guess the costume designer didn’t have smaller breasted women in mind when they came up with these tops. Oh well.
A rushing defender pulls her bra down and exposes her boob, but she is able to cover up and still make the throw? Tebow can barely throw a spiral when nobody’s on him.
Large breasts + small bikini top + beach volleyball = great day at the beach.
With this one, we couldn’t tell if it was a full-blown wardrobe malfunction. But we erred on the side of caution.
Yet another water polo player’s boob exposed. You think they could do something to correct this “problem,” no?
Remember Gabby Sabatini, the sexy Argentine tennis player? She didn’t like wearing bras, for some reason. But hey, it worked for her. She won the US Open in 1990.
I’m starting the think the LFL doesn’t really care of the players’ boobs fall out.
That’s embarrassing. And, I imagine, cold.
Whoever fitted these ladies for their uniforms must have flunked out of seamstress school.
Do the judges deduct points for this sort of thing?
This was an attempt to bribe the judges. Sadly, only judge #6 liked what he (or she) saw.
Man, nipples are the LFL’s bread and butter.
By the title of this one, I mean to imply that it’s not the wardrobe’s fault this woman’s breast is exposed. That’s a huge rack that just about any shirt would have trouble containing.
This move has to be illegal in water polo, right? Then again, I’m not quite sure if the look on that woman’s face is agony or ecstasy.
Argentine actress and model Pamela David is a big supported of the national soccer team. Obviously.
You would think that, if all there was between your naked breast and the world was a little piece of plastic string, you might wear pasties underneath your costume…just in case.
Brazilian girls love the beautiful game, that’s for sure.
Does Greece have an official nude women’s water polo team? Or is was this woman the victim of the most malfunctioning sports wardrobe ever?
This never happens when I go to the football game.
I’m not sure what the hell (former) Diva Melina Perez was thinking here. Surely she realized that going commando in that skirt would leave her a little exposed. But hey, whatever floats your boat.